Remember this list???

Squats/Single Leg Squat
Pull-Up (chin ups)
Leg Curls
Cross cable Row (worked shoulders and arms)
Bicep Curl
Outer Hip and Thighs
Oblique Twister (I couldn't even do ONE... but I'm not sure I was doing it right.)
Seated Chest Press
Front Pullover with and without crunches
Triceps Extension
Shoulder Press
Core Extension
Toe Touch Stretch (Post workout/Final Stretch) 

I couldn't do hardly one full set of ANY of these the other day on Level 4.  (But for squats and legs... which happen to be my forte...)

I dropped down one level and was able to do ALMOST 2 full sets on EVERYTHING...  But it was STILL VERY hard.  My goal is to get to 3 FULL sets of everything on the list... Feels like it'll be forever.

I am SO sore, though.  I mean, folding laundry is hard! 

I also believe I hurt my neck... or pulled something.  Ever since the workout yesterday, each time I turn my head or move it in a manner it pulls and hurts really bad.  (Sort of like a major kink...)  Please pray that I can work it out...  :)  I want to not be HINDERED whatsoever in my workout routine! 

************

I'm also wondering... do you think my high(er) carb days would be better on strength training days, or cardio days?   I try to keep my protein higher on strength training days... but I'm not sure about the carbs. 

Update and Looking for Input...

I put this on Nataly's blog because I was originally asking her... but then realized that I could put it here and ask EVERYONE...  LOL!  (Sorry about that Nataly... feel free to reply here.)

Okay... the organs in place thing... I've tried it several times... but it always hurts so bad. I'm not sure if it's because my bladder and uterus are damaged or what. (My bladder is permanently attached to my uterus, which is permanently attached to my naval wall. (Even when not pregnant my uterus is at my naval because of the adhesions from my c-sections. It can't go back to it's "original" place.) Does it hurt when you do the organs in place thing? Should I even keep attempting it since my uterus will never go back? (They've tried to surgically correct it 3 times, and every time it's done the same thing...)

What are your ladies thoughts?

*************

Today is my second day of weights.  I am already SO SORE and I haven't even DONE anything yet.  My whole body is sore.  I'm not sure if it's from the weights on Tuesday (since they say the SECOND day after is always the worst) or if it's from my 4+ hours planting and tilling and weeding in the garden yesterday...  Anyway, I am DREADING today's workout... but I'm going to go have my protein shake and get to it right away.  :)

I've also decided that I'm going to NOT do "no carb" days... but I'm going to try for some "very low" carb days.  :)  And then some higher days.

I hopped on the scale, and while not officially tracking, I was curious.  I was down 2 pounds since Monday.  Of course, I'm not "counting" this... lots could happen between now and my official weigh-in at the beginning of June... but it was encouraging.  I don't even feel like I'm actually doing much "work" to get it off...  (meaning I'm not working HOURS to get it off... I used to workout for over an hour and a half every day... now it's 30-45 minutes a day... HALF of what I *WAS* doing...) and so I tend to be skeptical.

Wow!

My strength training days ended up being T,R, and Sat. this week.  So today was my first training day. 

Okay, so the Total Gym has 6 levels... and it all works off of your body weight.  I thought I could do level 4. 

I could with my leg workouts.  My legs are definitely still strong.  (But think about it... they have to carry all my extra weight around all the time.)  My arms, abs, shoulders, back...  it was SO hard.  I could only do 1 set of some and not even a full set with all of them.  I was SO embarrassed.  I hadn't realized how weak I had gotten.  I used to be extremely strong.  I used to be able to kick many of the guys derriere's in the weight room in high school.  Now, I am MUSH!  :( 

On Thursday, I'll be dropping down to Level 3.  I'm hoping I don't need to go down to Level 2... that would CRUSH me!  (I'm still at a level 4 or even 5 for my legs... but my husband suggested I stay at one level for everything and just do more repetitions of the legs until the rest of my body catches up.  (For ease sake... otherwise, I'd have to switch to differing levels a lot throughout the workout.)

Here is today's workout... and boy could I feel it.  My muscles were ALL shaking while I was making dinner.  I went to go pick up the baby and thought... "Man, he feels like he's gained 40 pounds since I last picked him up!"  LOL! 

Squats/Single Leg Squat
Pull-Up (chin ups)
Leg Curls
Cross cable Row (worked shoulders and arms)
Bicep Curl
Outer Hip and Thighs
Oblique Twister (I couldn't even do ONE... but I'm not sure I was doing it right.)
Seated Chest Press
Front Pullover with and without crunches
Triceps Extension
Shoulder Press
Core Extension
Toe Touch Stretch (Post workout/Final Stretch)

All I can say is... I am absolutely stunned at how weak I've allowed myself to become over the years.  It was a HUGE wake-up call.  I can't WAIT to get into shape... and I can't wait to feel strong again, and be able to do all the things I want to. 

More Thoughts/Goals

Right now, I'm in a size 18/20 jeans depending on the cut/style.

I don't even know if it's possible, but here are a few goals... (I'll adjust if I meet the goals sooner!)

Size 15/16 jeans by August 1st
Size 13/14 jeans by October 1st
Size 11/12 Jeans by December 1st
Size 9/10 Jeans by February 1st (and my birthday)

I actually wear skirts... but I thought trying on jeans would be a good idea.  My husband would like me to wear jeans now and then anyway for our special "date nights" together at home... so... I'll be needing a pair or two anyway!  *wink*  (And I realize most jeans come in even sizing... but my husband likes a certain yoked style brand on me and they come in ODD sizes- why both sizes are listed... LOL!)

One thing that is very exciting and motivating to me is that the Total Gym has a workout program for children ages 8 and older.  Which means that Daddy will be working out with our 8 and 9 year olds.  They are SO excited.  :)  I am excited to be doing this with them!

I'm going to aim for 5 meals per day... with another "snack"  before bed.  I  really don't like going very long without eating- especially at night.  I feel almost ill when I wake up from lower blood sugars if I don't eat some sort of bedtime "snack"...   I will also be aiming for 150g of protein daily.  So, roughly 25-30g each meal.  I don't think this is going to be too difficult.  Some good sources of protein (which I eat NORMALLY) are:

Whey Protein Drink (base- not including extra ingredients): 23g
Chicken (4oz) 30-35g
Tuna (6oz) 40g
Ground Pork (4oz.) avg. 20g, with tenderloins (what we use most) at 29g
Egg (1 large) 6g
Milk (1 cup) 8g
Cottage Cheese (4oz.) 15g
Yogurt (8oz) 10g
Cheese (1oz) 8-10g depending on type, Mozz. lower, swiss/cheddar middle/Parmesan highest
Beans (per 1/2c cooked)- 8g
Peanut Butter (2T)- 8g
Chia seed (1oz/2.75T)- 4g

I am motivated to do well, and can't wait to see results.  I will be weighing in every week, but only recording weight on my blog once per month.  (I'll report again in the beginning of June for continuity sake, then the beginning of each month after that.)   I will also be reporting my dress/pant size at the beginning of each month as well.  I will update my inches/centimeters lost every two weeks or so.  (Or whenever I need encouragement! LOL!)

I don't promise to update my blog every day, but I will try to at least get it in a few times per week.  (Ideally, it would be every day M-F... and most Saturdays... but I shall not promise that!  LOL!)  

So... here we go ladies!  :)  

Initial Plan and Measurements...

I am ready to go!  :)   Here is an "initial" plan.  I have been thinking, and I'm not quite cemented in what I want to do yet... but I have a general idea... so I will share that!  (But expect some tweaking until I figure it all out!)

I will be trying to follow the suggestions from http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/par30.htm  (more or less).

I will be doing one day each of high carb, low carb, and no carb days consecutively. Then repeating that cycle. One day a week (likely my Saturday - date night) I will not be worrying about whether it is high, low, or no carb.  I won't over indulge in carbs, but I will also not limit my carbs.  I feel this is necessary for not feeling burned out.

I will be exercising 6 days per week.

Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays are strength training days.  Rather than setting a time "limit" I will be setting a workout limit.  Our total gym has different programs you can do in training... so my workouts will vary. 

Tuesdays and Thursdays I will be doing some sort of Cardio/Aerobics.  At LEAST 30 minutes, but I am aiming for 45-60 minutes each day.

Saturday is a "choice" day.  I may do dancing, bicycling, or whatever.  :)  

Fluid intake: at least 3 quarts daily.

I will continue using my Chia shakes in the morning, not because they "fill" me up... but because they are packed with nutrition, and I have found that I really enjoy those "shakes".  I will be adding whey protein to them though... as well as to meals before/after strength training workouts.

So, that is my "basic" plan... I may tweak it for this week as I see what "really" works for me... and what does not.  :)

****************

Weight:  (I will be weighing myself in the morning, I'll update after that...)

Measurements:  (inches first... but I will be measuring by centimeters)

Neck: 14"/35.5cm
Upper Arm: 17.5"/45cm
Forearm: 12"/31cm
Wrist:  7.5"/19cm
Chest: 45"/115cm
Bust: 38"/97cm
Upper Abs: (Stomach- 2" above Naval):  44"/112cm
Lower Abs: (Ummm... spare tire?):  51"/130cm
Hips: 52"/132cm
Thigh: 30"/76.5cm
Calf: 19"/49cm
****************

Those numbers make me SICK to my stomach... but I am trying to focus on the goal... those numbers WILL go down, and I WILL see results.  :)  

Sitting...

Like a duck.  Which means, I'm in danger. 

I was still doing much of the challenge Angie figured out while I was at her house... but not all of it- especially not the exercise part of it.  I realized that I need to find an exercise I can do ALL month long.  I also talked to Angie on the phone yesterday (*waves to Angie*) and she was telling me about her research in muscle building and carb cycling.  I used to do that after I had my daughter Josie, and lost a lot of weight, near effortlessly.  I am considering going back to that.  I had just sort of forgotten all about that until Angie began telling me about some of her research.

I told my husband last night that I wanted him to show me how to use his Total Gym.

He was THRILLED!  So...

I am going to renew my information on the Carb Cycling/High Protein advantages, figure out a plan that utilizes the Total Gym a few days each week, as well as a couple of days of aerobics/cardio.  Then, when I get a plan set up... I'm going to share it with my world of 3 or 4 blogging friends.  :)  LOL!

So... I'll continue doing the Chia shakes in the morning, because I have found that I personally LOVE them.  I will also add in additional protein though as well for that breakfast "meal".   But... those are preliminary plans... you want to know the whole deal... so that'll come.  I start on Monday... so be watching for an update.  :)  I plan on measuring myself and taking my weight down... I'll post those at the same time, as well.

Ah Ha!

Well, I figured  no one was even visiting my blog anymore, so had decided to quit.  Then, lo and behold, I had a sweet friend come by and give me a nudge.  (Waves to Heather!)   So, I guess I still do have a reader.  :) 

Heather asked about how the challenge with Angie was going...

I guess I should start there.  (Since Angie already explained everything over at her blog... check out onemotivatedmamma... I'll spare you the boredom of explaining it.)

I've been doing fairly well.  I did EXCELLENT last week.  This weekend I went to celebrate my friends 25th wedding anniversary and then my parents 35th wedding anniversary in Minnesota.  It was more difficult to stay "on track" due to traveling.  However, I did very well on Saturday.  I got my exercise done in the morning before leaving, as well as my chia shake.  I didn't have salad for lunch (because there was none), but I chose a small chicken salad croissant, carrots, celery, pineapple, grapes, and watermelon.  So... still all very healthy choices.  :)  (Well, maybe not the chicken salad COMPLETELY...)  On Sunday, I got in my Chia shake in the morning... and that was about it.   I also got my monthly cycle a few days early while there on Sunday, and so did not exercise.  (I try and give my body a few days to rest when that makes an appearance...)  I did not exercise Monday or Tuesday and had planned on beginning today.   For certain reasons (I don't need to explain to a bunch of women.... right? lol) I won't be exercising this morning yet either.... but hopefully by this evening I can start with an hour of walking anyway.  I'll be planting the last half of my garden this afternoon as well... so that is work.  I'll be ripping up the soil again with a hand plow... so that should count for SOMETHING... lol!

So... that is a brief update on how it is going.  I had lost 4 pounds in 4 days last week before my cycle returned.  I will again weigh myself later this week.  (My weight has a habit of going up during this time of month... so no need to get discouraged with weighing myself now, right???)

I promise to try and stay more faithful to this blog and to my lonely one (or two) readers.  :) 

I'm back!

and I am seriously not liking the changes... in blogger.  LOL!  Oh well.  I've always been resistant to change, I'm sure this one will be no different.

I spent about 10 days at Angie's house plus the 4 days from the week prior.  That's TWO WEEKS!!! LOL!  We had fun.  I think each of us did well.  Sure we didn't eat PERFECTLY, but we didn't eat a ton of junk either.  We exercised some as well.  (I didn't exercise the last part of our visit due circumstances, but I never DO exercise then... so it didn't bother me much.

This week has been a wash so far.  Monday was busy in finalizing the unpacking, cleaning, etc. of the house after our vacation, and then Tuesday was spent preparing for the Home Study.  Wednesday I went on a walk with the family.  That was nice.  We walked the perimeter of our town... which is just over a mile.  (We live in a very small town... LOL!  The entire town has only 5 streets!)

Today, I skipped breakfast... again.  (I've skipped breakfast every day since coming home- including Sunday.)  It's so easy for me to fall back into that bad habit again.  :(  I really REALLY want to try to do better with that tomorrow.

I have chosen not to weigh myself for a while.  Every time I get on the scale, I'm just depressed... which tends to sabotage my efforts.  So, I'm just trying to make wise choices in eating, get in some exercise every day, and drink all my water.  I am still juicing as well.  (Most days.)  I think that perhaps tomorrow I'll make a post about my juicer.  Since I've had two people ask about it.  :) It'll be fun to do.

Anyway, that is where I am "at".  Now that I am home, and settled, I hope to post more regularly, and to keep up with the rest of you ladies.  :)

Blessings,

Leaving for the week again...

I know.  You must all think that my husband doesn't work ever.  LOL!  Actually he usually works six days a week, and for over a decade used to work 10-14 hour days, with occasional Sundays, too.  But since he got his new position in the factory, he has been blessed with working only 8 hours a day, plus Saturdays.  His particular department is ahead of schedule, so they are giving everyone lay-off time.  And, since you don't get to schedule vacation at his company (they tell YOU when you are going to get vacation... and most often, it ends up at the wrong time of year to do anything)... you learn to take those lay-offs with appreciation.  :)

So, we are off to Angie's house again.  One day, we'll head elsewhere and meet some NEW faces and NEW friends.  :)  But for now... we'll  "suffer" there with her family.  LOL!  *wink*  Actually, it is a blast at her house.  We love her family dearly.  (And to think I was SO nervous that my knees were LITERALLY shaking when we first met!) 

Anyway, I will try to update as often as I can.  (If she'll ever let me use her computer... she's pretty selfish that way, you know... )  I REALLY want to try to continue exercising at least  30 minutes every day (but Sunday) and eating good foods. Of course, I'm not above a treat now and then- but I want my focus to be on health...  (Angie wants to as well... so help keep us BOTH on our toes!)

Journey Log for Thursday, April 12th

Breakfast: Sausage, Egg and Cheese sandwich (on whole wheat english muffin), orange
Lunch: Bean/Rice Burrito (last one, we make and freeze ahead of time), large handful of carrot sticks with ranch, 8oz. glass of milk.  
Dinner: Homemade Garlic Chicken Alfredo Pizza, 2 slices, 3 cup romaine/spinach salad with garlic Caesar dressing.


Snacks: Mozzarella Cheese stick, 2 celery ribs w/cream cheese, sliced English cucumber w/sprinkling of salt

Water: 88oz. water
Exercise: 30 minutes Aerobics (WATP)

Thursday, and planning again! LOL!

Well, I did fairly well with the plan for Tuesday.  I ate exactly what I said I would.  But for dessert, well-   :(  Dh bought me some Champ Ice Cream cones.  I had planned on a *healthy* dessert (because I did end up drinking soda with dinner, which I did NOT plan on doing).  But, I still went ahead and ate that ice cream cone.  :(  I began my exercising again as well on Tuesday.  For both Tuesday and Wednesday I did a 30 minute walk with Leslie.  Both days, my hands swelled and my body (especially the joints- like fingers, elbows, knees) turned red and itched.  What is up with that? 

I've never had that before, but with all the other odd symptoms I've been having lately, I think I just need to keep doing it- even if weird things happen.  I'm not a health guru per se- but something tells me that my body needs to "heal" and one way to get things better is by good ol' healthy eating and exercising.  I definitely *FEEL* better after I exercise.  It's just DURING the exercise.  So I will continue on.  :)

I'm not going to be doing a juicing fast like I had planned. As much as I say I'm not worried about toxin release and breastfeeding- I still am.  I don't want to be giving my baby toxins just so I can get healthy- and there is NO WAY I'll stop breastfeeding for that either.  I still will incorporate juicing throughout my journey.  I think it's a great way to get in more nutrients, and I do want to detoxify and heal my body ... even if that means slowly.  So, you'll see "juice" on my menus... assume it's not processed apple juice okay?  :)

I've been re-reading the Schwarzbein Principle again- and I really agree with the author.  I'm going to be incorporating her eating methods with daily exercise.  I basically agree with her anyway- but it's good to be reminded, because in this low-fat - high carb. era... it's hard not to give in to the mentality that fats are bad for you!  (And, hey- I truly enjoy some (healthy) fat with my meals!  :)

So...


Journey Log for Wednesday April 11th:

Breakfast: 2 eggs, 1 slice buttered toast with garlic salt, water
Lunch: 1 bean/rice burrito with cheese, sour cream and tapatio sauce
Dinner: Hamburger w/tomatoes, onion, lettuce, pickles (you get the idea), mayo, and baked potato.  Glass of herbal raspberry tea.

Water: 96 ounces
Exercise: 30 minutes aerobic

***Oh, and I discovered something last night.  I thought my glasses only held 12 ounces of water.  Nope. They hold 16 ounces.  So, I've been drinking a lot more water than I thought I was.***  Very GOOD thing.  :)

Going the Distance...

I am here today.  I can't see what tomorrow holds.  I cannot change what yesterday was.  So, today- I must focus on, all else is wasted time. 

I got on the scale today and after eating junk (mostly) over the weekend, it showed I was up by two pounds.  *Ugh*.  I weighed myself last week and had actually dropped down to 217.  Today, it shows I am 222.  Can we just say I felt like either quitting altogether or starving myself to get weight off fast? 

But neither of those are healthy, and neither of those options bring glory to my Lord.  Nataly reminded me today that this journey I began was for the Lord.  It's turned into something akin to self-fulfillment/ self-failure.   He's not been in it... because I haven't given it over to Him.

So, today, I am (re)committing to going the distance... but not alone.  I am handing the reins back to Him.  I'm going to do my best, try to be diligent in making wise decisions and healthy choices.  I will not step on the scale and bemoan the fact that the weight isn't coming off. Nor will I step on the scale and celebrate that the weight *is* coming off.  For me, that is just too tempting to give myself and my efforts self-glory. 

I am busy organizing bookshelves, catching up on laundry, doing grocery shopping for the next few weeks, and doing finishing touches for our homestudy (which should be beginning here soon... they wanted to do it tomorrow... but with our recent trip, I knew my house would not be ready).  But, with all that- I am committed to finding 30 minutes to exercise. 

April 10th (plan):

Breakfast: Two scrambled eggs with onion and bell peppers
Lunch: Bean and Rice Burrito with oranges
Dinner: Grilled Chicken Sandwich, Baked Potato, Salad

Dessert/Snacks: Not sure...

Exercise: At least 30 minutes
Water: At least 64 ounces

Checking in...

I didn't want you to think I had dropped out of the pilgrimage.  That was a pretty depressing post last time, huh?  I thank you all for your comments and encouragement. I read every one... several times. 

It ended up that my husband didn't get his paycheck last week due to his team leader messing up his DTR.  So we had to use what was in the house.  No fresh veggies for juicing.  So, that decision was made for me.  We ended up eating things like:  Breakfast burritos, BBQ chicken tenderloins, bean/rice burritos, etc.  LOL! 

I just focused on walking every day and stretching.  I stayed away from any mirror that went below the shoulders and put away the scale.  I'm NOT going to allow myself to become depressed.  That will just discourage me and make me give up when the effort seems to outweigh the benefit. 

I'm off to Angie's for the weekend- Happy Easter to everyone.  I'm not worrying about health or eating or weight.  I'm just going to go have a good time enjoying fellowship with my friends.  Come next week, we'll be adding exercise into our routine, eating healthier foods (we used up most of the junk that was sitting around our house in our "eat what we have" stretch.)  My husband, children and I are all looking forward to a good start.  :) 

Blessings,

SO discouraged...

I have been so stressed lately, and it all came to a head yesterday.  I sat and cried for a good hour.  I hate crying... and rarely do it.  (Well, okay- I am a sap and will cry at movies sometimes... but I'm talking emotional let-down type crying.)

I am quite discouraged.  First, the adoption of my nephew seems like it's falling apart.  I've gained weight and am now 220 pounds again.  That is where I was when I got pregnant with Silas.  I've felt horrible since my (suspected) miscarriage. I've just eaten and eaten (even though the food was healthy- it's been WAY too much.  I've just been SOOOO hungry)... and now... I find out yesterday that our baby is losing weight.  He's lost two pounds in just one month.  He's been fussy and "hungrier" the past few weeks, but being 6 months old, I thought it was just a growth spurt.  But yesterday when I weighed him- he was down to 17.5 pounds.  He was almost 20 pounds just a month ago.  My heart just broke.  I've NEVER had milk supply or quality issues before.  And here, I am obviously starving my baby... but my body is gaining weight.   He's nursing 8-9 times every day- and obviously I can't provide for him.   :(

Okay, lest I begin to cry again... I've got to move on.

I just want to be healthy.  I've got to get back to exercising again.  I can't sit around and wait for my body to "heal".  I'm living in constant pain and depression from waiting.  My husband wants me to wait- just give it another week or two- but being so discouraged is really beginning to weigh on me.  I NEED more than this.  I want to honor my husband though because he "sees" me the way I really am.  When I need to rest, *I* tend to push.  But, at the same time- while honoring his wisdom and wishes, *I* need more.  I feel like I'm falling into despair.  Exercise makes me feel better.  Juicing makes me feel like garbage.  (Seriously.  I get the shakes and headaches and nausea from juicing for breakfast and lunch.  Sad, isn't it?)  :(  But, I know that giving my body that time to "rest" is GOOD for me.  So, I keep doing it.

So... my baby is now eating baby cereal, as well as nursing.  I need to figure out some good measures I can take to increase my milk supply.  I NEED to eat- and try to get the quality up as well.  But, I also want to juice.  I also want to begin exercising again.  I won't do aerobic exercise- but even just walking will help.  (I honestly think walking will help my body to heal, too- get the blood going.)

Today, I failed.  I ate nothing. Drank nothing.  It's after lunch now.  I'm going to make some juice, and enjoy it.  Then, I'm going to go for a walk with my children... nothing heavy.  Just fresh air and a stretch of the muscles.  Then, I'm going to enjoy dinner tonight, and family night.  I'm going to talk to my husband and just share my heart with him. Then, I'm going to make a plan.  And I'm going to pick myself up.  Stop being discouraged.  The Lord isn't getting glory in this.  I'm pouting and whining about what isn't getting accomplished instead of trusting in Him to help me figure out what I *can* do.

Today begins an attitude adjustment.  Tomorrow begins a life-style adjustment.

Oh, and I know my husband wants to start his exercise routine. He's already told me as much.  He just wants to wait until he thinks *I* am physically ready.  Maybe I can convince him to do a "gentle" start- making some good habits together for the next week and really get "into" it come Easter.   :)  That is my hope.

I have enjoyed reading your blogs.  You are often such an encouragement to me.  I apologized that my blog has been LESS than encouraging lately.  I pray that changes.  Thank you for letting me share my heart this time.

The reason for delaying...

Sorry gals... all two or three of you that actual follow me anymore.  LOL!  I was going to update last night, but fell asleep... which leads me to my update.

I told you I would explain why we are not "juicing" alone right now.  I wasn't going to mention anything, but felt I at least owed you all an explanation why it seems I've been so wishy-washy lately. 

Do you remember when I was bleeding not too long ago... extremely heavy and for about 3.5 weeks before it finally all subsided?  My obstetrician is pretty certain by my cycles that I miscarried a  little one.  We hadn't planned on becoming pregnant and so it really wasn't too much on my radar.  I had missed a cycle, then spotted at around 3 weeks of my next cycle.  Then came the long, heavy-near hemorrhaging of my last cycle.  I never tested, but after bleeding for almost 4 weeks, they found an elevated hcg in my bloodwork.  Not viable for pregnancy, but higher than what a non-pregnant woman should have. I would have been about 9-10 weeks pregnant. So, while we cannot be sure- it's highly likely that we did lose a baby. 

In any case, I lost A LOT of blood.  My iron levels are near transfusion level. I am fighting fatigue, my fibromyalgia is putting my body through the roof in pain, where even slight movement is causing trouble.  I'm falling asleep throughout the day, falling behind on life, etc.  As much as it kills me to go slowly- I can't keep forcing my body to fight and regain strength without feeding it.

So, no exercise and I'm not juicing alone.  I am still juicing because I *do* feel those nutrients will help aid in my healing- but my husband, doctor and I all feel that I need the other necessary nutrients to heal.  So... that is where I stand... and why it's been so slow going.

(I also am near certain that is why my husband is being hesitant in starting our competition.  He is so worried - I can see it almost every time he looks at me.   I love him for that, but...)

Anyway, that is my update.

Brief Update...

I will be coming back later tonight to update more specifically.

For those who know my husband personally, you can testify that it is VERY difficult to get him to give an answer on anything without it taking eons for him to consider it first.  LOL!  (Well, that's what it FEELS like to this snap-decision woman.  My dear beloved is a Mr. Steady to the core.  He doesn't make decisions very quickly, but he DOES stick with his decisions once they are made.  I tend to change my mind more.  LOL!)

Anyway, I am STILL waiting on him to give me his "prize" ideas for our competition.  He asked that we don't "officially" start the competition yet.  Not until he is ready.  So, I am just "laying low" until then.  (Don't worry- he promised to give me a response by this weekend.)

I've been incorporating juicing into my day, but it's not been a strict adherence yet.  I'll explain why later.  I just wanted to pop in and let you know I haven't vanished.  I am looking forward to a heartier update tonight!

Wednesday...

A horrible start.  *sigh*  I was doing okay and then about 9am, my lips began swelling again.  We have NO clue what is causing this.  :(  It's not happening with eating or anything else.  It just comes and goes out of the blue.  Antihistamine isn't helping either.  I feel SO worn down these past few days as well.  My face is extremely tender (on the side that was most affected by the Bell's Palsy)... I'm not sure if that is a GOOD sign or a BAD one.  I am SO SICK of feeling blah!  I'm sick of swelling and pain.  Of feeling tired and exhausted.  Even after sleeping for 8 hours every night.  SO STINKIN' SICK AND TIRED of BEING SICK and TIRED.

I am stressed and swamped.  It's not normal for me to feel like I'm always catching up.  I'm the one who is usually always AHEAD of the game.  ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....

Okay, vent over.  Heather, I want you to know that I am receiving your comments, and appreciate them.  They show up for me... so not sure why they aren't showing up for you?  But I *am* getting them.  :)

We made our first juice last night.  Carrots and Apples.  Very simple.  But, I couldn't wait to see how it worked.  :)  My  husband and I each got 6oz. and the children each had 4oz. (So... 32 oz. of juice)  I don't think that is a poor amount of juice from 5 carrots and 1 apple.   :)  We ended up not having the banana sorbet though.  :(  Dumb me didn't think to CUT the bananas before throwing them into the freezer.  So, we didn't have time once I semi-thawed the bananas and then cut them... and then had to wait for them to refreeze.  So... we will do that tonight.

This morning I made some more carrot and apple juice.  As soon as I get off, I am going to make some cucumber-celery-apple juice.  I will be waiting to start with the heavier greens once my body gets a few days of juicing in....

Praying this swelling in my lips goes down.  We have a birthday/anniversary celebration to go to with friends tonight and well... I *am* vain enough to NOT want to be seen like this.  (Even though I wish I could say I was not.)

My husband wasn't sure on *his* side of the weight loss/health plan... so I've got to wait to update with that.  He's supposed to be thinking more about it today, so we'll see if we get something down on paper tonight.  :)

Tuesday Update...

The juicer arrived today!  :)  I haven't opened it yet though.  I want to wait for Jared to have a chance to open it as well.  (After all, he's the one who bought it for me... us! )

Tonight, for dessert, we are making frozen banana sorbets topped with fresh berries.  :)  Just to try it out.  Our first "juicing day" is tomorrow morning.

We will be nailing down our goals and rewards tonight for our "friendly competition" between the husband and I.  I'm excited about that as well.  :)  I'll share more of that tomorrow though...once I know more.

Oh, and Angie, I never watched Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead.  I have a friend who has been a raw foods fanatic for about three years, and so I'm ALWAYS hearing her harp.  I also *accidentally* found the reboot site when looking up information/reviews for my juicer.  I don't need to watch the video just to be told what I already believe.  LOL!  I won't be following the reboot site's recommendations per se... but I did glean some information from them.

Anyway... that's today's update.  Can't wait to actually JUICE something tomorrow morning.

By the way, I know a few of you have juicers.  I'm wondering what kind you have, and whether or not you like it.  (I'm just curious for comparison reasons, is all!)

Blessings,

Monday Monday...

Good day everyone!  :)  Welcome to my roll call Denise!  I am happy to have you on the Pilgrimage!

I am still very excited about our juicing!  My husband and I are still tweaking our "competition" goals.  We are about the same number on the BMI calculator, so we may be incorporating that rather than total weight loss.  I know I'm already at a disadvantage because he loses weight VERY easily, and well... I GAIN very easily.  LOL!  *BUT*  that will NOT discourage me.  It just means I need to work extra hard.  (And since I'm at home while he's at work, I guess I *do* have the advantage there.)  Anyway, we went to the store last night and bought $200 worth of good organic veggies and fruits for this week.  Spinach, Romaine, Collard Greens, Broccoli, Carrots, Bell Peppers, Celery, Apples, Yams, Bananas, Grapes, Lemons, Limes, Cucumbers... all that good stuff!  :)

The juicer doesn't arrive until tomorrow (according to tracking)... so we will "officially" begin tomorrow evening with a celebratory "RAW sorbet" made from bananas and frozen fruit for dessert... (one benefit of the Omega J8004 is that is makes sorbets and pastas AND good healthy fresh juice)  Wednesday morning we begin our juicing routine.   And of course, we'll be trying to incorporate some good high-vegetable meals before then.  I can't say just how EXTREMELY excited I am!

Anyway... that's the GOOD news!

The bad news... we received a call this morning and Iowa has sent back our Adoption Homestudy request back to Minnesota.  This puts the adoption process on hold until more information on my nephew can be gathered.  This negates the expedited homestudy/adoption process.  Which in short means, *if* we get my nephew... it won't be April like we had hoped.  It may not even be until later in the summer.  :(

One other discouraging thing is that my state wanted to know how we would have enough room for 7 children and 2 adults in a 3 bedroom home.  Please pray we find a larger house (within our price range) soon!

In all things though, we know the Lord has a plan and a purpose.  We want our nephew to be our son.  That is the desire of our hearts.  The Lord can work despite obstacles.  He can either provide us with this house, or a different house.  He can also make a way for us to live here and still be able to adopt our nephew, if that is His will.  If He wills it, He can make a way for it.

Mama, You're Beautiful!

This is what I hear from my daughter on a nearly daily basis.  And while I honestly cannot say I agree with her, it is SO good to hear that kind of encouragement.  :)  My daughter doesn't care that I am overweight, or that my hair is graying.  She doesn't care that I have lasting effects of the Bell's Palsy.  All she sees is her Mama... and she thinks I'm beautiful! 

Of course, I am working on becoming more healthy.  But, sometimes I must admit- I dream of having that body I had when I was 17 and starving.  Then I must think "WHY?"  I wasn't beautiful then.  At least, not in the right way or to the right people... not to anyone who truly loved me.  What I want is to be beautiful to my family,and to my friends.  And that comes from a beautiful inside.  Character.  Personality.  Love.  While I want to be a good example of health to my children, I want to make sure that my focus is more on the beauty within.  I am one of those people who can allow myself to become sidetracked on what is truly important when I set my mind to a goal. 

So, I just wanted to share... nothing profound or amazing.  But perhaps just encouraging.  It's okay if you fail sometimes.  What is important is the lesson you glean from it.  Do you mope about and just quit?  Or do you refocus and press on?  Do you mourn your weakness?  Or do you strive to build your strength?  My children see me fail.  I only hope that they see that I continue to press on.  That I don't have all the answers, and that I'm a work in progress.  While I may not be beautiful on the outside... my insides... my heart, character, personality, love... those are things that won't fail.  Those are the things that truly make one beautiful. 

Now... if I can keep that in focus while I strive to make the rest healthy as well.  :)

Oh...and for those who have in the past or do now currently juice... I'd love to hear a favorite recipe or two... 

Anyone OUT THERE???

I'm excited because our juicer is shipped.  It should arrive early next week.  :)   Although no one commented on their thoughts about our juicer... (you all had your chance LOL!)... we went ahead and ordered the Omega J8004.  It's identical to the model I posted, but it's white and about $50 cheaper.  :)

I am SO excited to be juicing. I am hoping it helps with so many things I'm fighting.  I know my health is suffering, and the food choices I've been making don't always help.  I already eat veggies and really enjoy them, but I know I can get even more good stuff in.  My husband is going to be juicing with me as well.  We are going to juice for breakfast and lunch. (The children will juice at breakfast, but eat lunch and dinner... I feel they need different types of nutrition since they are still growing.)  Then we will all eat a vegetable heavy dinner with some protein.  We are not going to avoid all carbs, but we are going to try to avoid those white carbs. that have snuck into our diets.  We used to ONLY use wheat flour... then a friend made me second guess myself- (as though cookies and pie crust were not as good made with wheat), and I began buying white flour to mix with our wheat.  I've got 3-4 cups of white flour left... so I'm going to make sugar cookies for my children with it... and then it's GONE.   No more white... going back to wheat and spelt.  :)

I am bummed though a bit because this week we've eaten a lot of junk.  We've been out every single night... so we've been eating "junk".  Even though I am trying to choose healthier choices... a grilled chicken sandwich and baked potato and salad at Wendy's is less healthy than home.  (Especially since we usually use whole wheat for our buns, and eat sweet potatoes rather than white potatoes.  Our salads are usually packed with spinach and romaine... not iceberg.)   It's amazing how healthy or unhealthy you can make a meal... just with simple modifications.  Anyway... my husband and I are going to do a "Biggest Loser" challenge between the two of us.  He didn't want to start until our first day of juicing... so more when that starts.  I CANNOT WAIT to get our juicer.  :)

We found out yesterday that two more of our children need glasses.  One is quite excited... the other- well, not so much.  (Thankfully, he only needs them for reading.)  So... we had the opportunity to spend $$$ on new glasses and eye exams yesterday.We were told our daughter's vision won't likely improve, but our son's may just improve with juicing.  So, it'll be neat to see if that helps him... especially since he isn't too keen on wearing glasses. My prescription also worsened, and I'm wondering if juicing might help me fix some of that.  (The astigmatism can't be helped... but perhaps the farsightedness may be... I'm excited to find out!)

Anyway, if anyone besides Heather is out there... I'd love to hear from you. (I'd be happy to hear for you again too though, Heather. LOL!)  Otherwise, I'll continue assuming you all don't like me.  *wink*